Be Glad that it Happened…Smile and Let it Go…

Smile Because it Happened - was a poster that I had seen at a colleague’s desk many many years back and has struck me since. It kind of reminds me to question less and accept more that it’s better to have experienced a situation and learnt the outcome rather than having had to keep guessing about it and making conclusions based on what someone else had said.

Our life doesn’t present us with every situations per our liking, nor will all the outcome be according to our choice. There are situations which go totally out of control and we wonder what went wrong!

A lesson in time

A couple of years I had to leave an organisation I was volunteering for and I was absolutely unhappy in the way the situations turned up. I would often reflect as to how things could have been better handled but there was never an answer. There never was an answer as to how and why the rift happened and how the closure came that quick when everything seemed to be going smooth and I was very comfortably placed.

As days and months passed, I realised I had nothing more left there and my willingness to continue doing the same things meant no growth for me either personally or from a learning point of view. Destiny had no option but to pull me out of the situation, so that I could reprioritise myself. The forces that guide me know what is best for me…

Friends helped along the way teaching me what I knew anyways but had perhaps forgotten. I remembered that self respect was important and drawing the lines and boundaries were important. And as time passed and I accepted that moving out(pulled out by forces unknown to me) was the most natural thing to have happened. And as I settled more into acceptance, I was pulled in to something else(where I currently contribute) to do what matters more at the present time. Here I know how not to overdo, how not to over stretch and how to give myself some rest I needed. And yes, I am functioning better than how I did before.

Lessons are repeated…

How much did I learn and how much more do I still have more to learn? Yes, one lesson isn’t enough. This time at a personal space, I set out to help someone who appeared to be broken. I took a few advise along the way and I was advised against trusting everything and everyone. I kept that advise in some corner of my head, but led my heart to listen, care, be available, be helpful. I did that because it wasn’t really my nature to ignore someone who seemed to trust me. Along the way, I did enjoy the similarities, the laughs and the light moments.

But as it had to happen, the warnings I had ignored surfaced but this time I questioned where I felt I needed an answer. This is where I learnt new lessons, lessons that your sword should always be ready even if you are the kindest person on the earth. I do not regret a bit about the time I have given, or the emotions I have invested because these were part of the learning curve.

May be this lesson was just to remind me that boundaries need to be defined better. May be there will me more lessons to realise as days go by.

Remembering words from a wise one

Someone I revere to some extent, had written in one his columns that it’s normal to draw people and situations who are looking for care, who are looking for sympathy, but the quicker you get out of that, the better.

Thoughts

At the end of the day, it’s about being honest to yourself and knowing that you did your best.

It is being able to go to bed each night with your soul at peace. — Paulo Coelho.